beating hearts baby

ok its official... I'm addicted to Grey's Anatomy. I actually was in love with it the first time i saw it but never could catch it when it was on... but now I have the first season and cant stop watching.
I have a few invites for you all... Thursday my friend Justin (he plays guitar and sings) is playing at Liberty Heights church. Should be good..if you wanna join me..
ALSO>>> Sunday my parents are having this cookout after church and also games and such for the kids to play. I told them I'd come and help with the kids..anyone else interested? They are all such great kids and i want to keep them all. Its hard because I've been on my parents about leaving because I know they are not happy there, but at the same time I know they love those kids, and feel like they would be abandoning them if they left. Pray for this situation. I still have this urge in my heart for mikayla. It makes me sad to think about her and what obsticles she's going to have to overcome as she gets older. If she even makes it that long. (if you have no idea who I'm talking about go back to the post about the zoo).
I've really been thinking about this whole career thing... and I really do think I wanna be a baby nurse... in neonatal care. That's probably gonna change eventually.. but for now it sounds good to me. And about the whole current job situation..I'm gonna stay where I am. I am thinking he is going to retire within the next year or so (hopefully) and there will probably be some sort of lump sum attached to that for each of us employees...so I'm sort of trying to hold out until then. But it is a good paying job and flexible..I am just feeling the need to move on. But I cant really do that until i get another job. So I was thinking that after I take this nurses aid training this term I should apply to one of the hospitals for a job. I know I'll have a better chance of getting a job if i wait and take the training first.
Some may say I'm spoiled because I dont pay my car insurance or phone bill (I hesitate even saying that..knowing again I show my age by not having many responsibilities). I told my mom today I would start paying those just so I can start getting ready for..life..for later when I have lots of other bills to pay. She basically told me to shut up and just use this time to save. I feel like I should have a lot more money saved up considering my living situation and such. But then again I do have a 2-day-a-week job. I did apply somewhere else but have heard nothing thus far.

This year I've really learned how important it is to have community. Or to live in community with others. I love it. And its hard to for me to understand how some people..like my sister..do it..who dont really have community outside of the immediate family . SHe just works too much at this job I know she should quit...while going to school full time and also living with my parents and attending to her husband. Its gotta be hard. Most of her friends that she still talks to (most of them on occasion) are shallow and self-centered. I try to be there for her...to listen when she vents...and have fun when we have time...but i know she needs more..she needs others...she needs more community. I dont even know why I went in to this right now.... except that she needs to be in my prayers more..and I ask that she be in yours also.

come back chrissi alice. i miss you. i love you love you.
blue ice cream is available for a few more weekends!


kati: did you ever see devon anymore? man I'm gonna miss that kid...


beating heart baby :)