Undecided

So I've been trying to be more open and willing to look at colleges- here and away... I know my deadline is real soon, but i also know that it doesnt have to be. Its just a little crazy sitting at lunch with some girls and they are all talking about what colleges theyve been accepted to and may be going... and I havent even applied yet. I know thats totally my fault- I've obviously been putting it all off- for way too long now. I just need guidance...

I will be turning 18 in 3 days and will be semi-officially an adult. The sad thing about this is that I am completely dependant and dont know how to do anything on my own. I definitly dont feel like an adult at all. I feel like I should still be a freshman in highschool- I basically have the same mind-set about my future as I did then, which is completely pathetic. Maybe its just the fact that I'm so content with my life right now(for the most part). And its so hard to think about doing anything else but go to school at Mason for like 6 or 7 hours everyday- thats all I've known for 13 years. Change is crazy. It will be good for me, Iknow, but I hate the thought of it right now.

I already know what you'd (whoever is reading this) may say or what advice you'd give-- which is probably the same as usual since this undesired topic of college comes up so involuntarily often. But if you think you've got something I havent heard yet, go ahead and take your best shot. I'll love you for it anyway:)

I dont want sympathy- I definitly dont expect it anyway. I just need prayer.